Aside from taking bits and pieces of Fray Justo, OP's Rule for Hermits as part of my own personal rule, I have the following:
"YOU are the hermit, not the family.
Don't want complaints from the family that this way of life ruined theirs. If they remember you for anything, it should be for being the best spouse and parent ever. Ideally, they would see only that, and only family-friendly devotions.
As Fray Justo advises, do not be opposed to spontaneity.
When caring for the family, offer it in reparation for those who don't.
Vigils will be when family illness awakens you. Offer it in reparation for those caretakers whose mouths are on auto-complain or for those who are in ignore mode (speaking of family caring for sick family).
Pray the office when able. Join sufferings to Jesus Crucified.
Take care of your health, that it may serve you to serve God (St. Francis de Sales). Try to work out thrice weekly, more if possible.
If obligations keep you from Daily Mass, pray to be able to attend at least on Thursday, when your emerging charism is making reparation for sins against the Blessed Sacrament.
Being there for God is also being there for the family. As St. Vincent de Paul says, "You're leaving God for God."
Blessings,
Gemma
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